'Musketeer' offers little;
flaws undermine movie
 By
Jeff Cantwell
Staff Writer
Did the American viewing public need a "re-imagined"
version of the Alexandre Dumas classic "The Three Musketeers?" Absolutely
not. But was the movie cool enough to justify it? With a heavy sigh,
I must say no.
"The Musketeer" is the most recent effort in Hollywood's
love affair with the 17th century French guardians. This time a Hong
Kong fight coordinator supervises the action.
I generally love Musketeer movies. Disney's version
was great, and I even found myself drawn to "The Man in the Iron Mask."
That's why it hurts so much to give this movie a bad review.
The story follows D'Artagnan (Justin Chambers),
who looks almost exactly like Disney's D'Artagnan, Chris O'Donnell.
He is out for revenge against Febre (Tim Roth), the man who killed his
father. He also desires to join the noble force known as the Musketeers.
In Paris he meets up with the Three Musketeers
and begins to fight the corrupt church that is threatening the King's
power.
This movie is so flawed; I am not sure where to
start.
Usually I don't worry about accents, but not one
person ever said D'Artagnan the same way; this includes Chambers, whose
accent is non-existent. Only the Queen and the Cardinal have French
accents, but the Queen is supposed to be Spanish.
The drama of the film, especially the love affair
between D'Artagnan and Constance, a friend of the Queen (Mena Suvari),
is hokey and kind of stupid.
There is also little sense of inspiration. In old
Musketeer movies, the audience would get a sense of power and dignity
from the Musketeers. Unfortunately, the phrase "All for one and one
for all" lost all its meaning in this recreation.
The only aspect left intact in the narrative was
the humor. The scenes with the Three Musketeers always presented the
little laughs and good times always associated with the three smart-mouthed
heroes.
So that leaves the fighting as the only possible
savior of this movie.
Some of the fights, like the ladder fight at the
end and the fight on the horse carriage were fun, despite seeming a
bit too fake and structured.
D'Artagnan was the only person in the film who
used kung fu-style fighting, and it actually fit in well with the film's
style. This was a swashbuckling film at its heart, and it accomplished
that. The problem came from the way the film was edited.
Director Peter Hyams ("End of Days") has too many
quick cuts during his battles. He needs to pull back with his camera
and let the action play out in long takes.
To his credit, Hyams depicts the 17th century Paris
beautifully using detailed sets instead of computer graphics.
"The Musketeer," despite all my desires otherwise,
comes off as nothing at all worth fighting for.
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