Holiday signifies big
step for young couples
By Emily Baldauf
Senior
Writer
Although Thanksgiving is one of her favorite
holidays, one Purdue student is afraid she may be too nervous during
the Thanksgiving feast to enjoy her favorite holiday foods.
Danielle Naurath, a junior in the School of Liberal
Arts, is meeting her boyfriend’s family for the first time on
Thanksgiving Day.
Although she has met his mother once, Thursday
she will meet about 20 more members of his family.
"I am pretty scared," she said. "I’m
scared that his family won’t like me or I’ll make the wrong
first impression."
The Thanksgiving gathering has been on Naurath's
mind for weeks because she wants everything from her manners to her
outfit to be perfect.
"I’ve been thinking all week about
to wear," she said. "I’ve even tried on a few outfits
for my sorority sisters to look at."
Although she is nervous about the four-day gathering,
she is optimistic about what this meeting will bring for her four-month
relationship.
"I don’t think it will go bad,"
she said. "I think it will bring us closer because we will be
able to share more because I’ll be able to understand him better."
Naurath is not the only one going home for the
first time with their significant other this week. On Thursday, at
dining room tables across the nation, anxious young couples will look
for support and acceptance amid the mashed potatoes and pumpkin pie.
Expert on dating David Coleman, better known
as the "Dating Doctor," who has been featured in the New
York Times, USA Today and Cosmopolitan, believes that meeting the
family of your significant other is an important step in any relationship.
"We all want to please our parents and those
of our significant other," Coleman said.
Although this type of pressure can be hard to
deal with, Coleman has a few suggestions for relaxing and allowing
the other person’s family to really get to know the true you.
"Be yourself," Coleman said. "Your
boy or girlfriend has told you things about his or her parents. Do
not put up a facade and pretend to be someone you are not or you will
have to keep up those pretenses every time you see them."
Especially at first-time meetings, Coleman advises
that you should be polite, sincere and brief in your comments. He
also said it is best if you don’t offer your opinions on controversial
issues unless you are asked.
"Those opinions are better saved until later,"
he said.
Making a first impression also comes from the
way you dress. Coleman suggests nice, causal attire for any first-time
meeting. "You don't want to look homeless and you don't want
to look like you are on your way to a board meeting," he said.
To really impress the relatives you are meeting
for the first time, Coleman suggests bringing a small gift. He recommends
a small holiday ornament. However, he warned against bringing a food
item to a dinner engagement.
"If you bring a food item, it could duplicate
her effort or give the impression that you figured she wouldn't have
or make your favorite item," he said. "Never one-up your
host."
Even if students do all they can to make a great
first impression, nervousness and the pressure to impress can ruin
the experience, but Coleman said even that's not a big deal.
"Parents will realize as time goes by that
you were nervous," Coleman said. "We all get second chances.
Make the most of it."
