It seems to us here at PLOHWCMMEWANRAABANGAS that everyone has some kind of special interest group here on campus. So we propose a new group. I think from the initials that were given it is inherently obvious what the name of this group is, but in case you haven't figured it out yet, this is the "Pro-Life Offensive Heterosexual White Caucasian Male Meat Eaters Who Are Not Racist And Are Bitter About Not Getting A Scholarship" group. The name of the group also specifies the requirements for joining our group. At our meetings, we will pass the time by watching sports, reading the swimsuit issue and eating steak. The group will also sponsor a scholarship just for its members. This way everyone truly does have a group.

For those of you that are offended by this letter, we would like you to look up two words in the dictionary for us: satire and sarcasm. In case you don't have a dictionary, or are still offended by this letter, we award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul. Go Boilers and God Bless

P.S. The word TIP in the dinning world is an acronym for "To Insure Promptness". A 15 percent tip should only be customary if you have received prompt and courteous service.